This is just an outlet for me, to be able to get my thoughts out! I am a Woman, Wife and Mommy that also works outside the home! Just me trying to make it all work for the best for my family and myself! Just my journey!

Monday, February 1, 2010

Dear Me,

You know, I see you think you have it all figured out! Sorry to tell you, you just don't!
Your ideas are pretty good, but your ways need work!
You do have some pretty good kids, but they are easily to go astray! I saw you holding and cuddling Mitchell today and praying over him and leaving everything else aside, because he needed you! What about your other two kiddos?? Where have you been? You do know, they need to be cuddled, hugged and kissed too, right? You didn't forget about them, did you?
However, I also saw, your mind reeling at all the "stuff" that needed to be done!
I was watching you closely and I felt your heart jump every time Mitchy asked you to hold him!
I saw you wake up at 4:00am to kiss your husband goodbye and I felt your pain as you said goodbye, knowing all along that he wouldn't be home until late and on your day off! I heard in your heart how, it would be about what you could do to get it done and not how you could make your family feel special and desired!
I felt the pain in your heart when you said "have a good day at work" all along knowing, that the conversation between the two of you, last night, wasn't finished! I know that that is faaaar different than anything you have been accustomed to, during the time of your marriage! I have watched, many times, as the two of you have had conversations or disagreements and not ending them without being completed. I know this is a different point in your life! I want you to embrace it, take the continuing of a "conversation" or a "disagreement" as time to pray, think and ponder where it is you want to go with the conversation! Is it something that needs to be resolved? Is it something that honestly needs to be discussed? Is it something that is hurting the two of you or only one of you? Is it something that you shouldn't let go or is it something that needs to be let go?
I have been watching you and you get stressed out over the lil' stuff! I have watched as you have loved out loud and lately, I have watched as you have "held back" your love and compassion, on account of stess and anger!
I know this isn't you, I know you are learning a new routine and somewhat of a new life! Give yourself a break!
Give your family a break!
Finish the discussions that need to be finished and let those that, don't need to be completed go!
Do NOT withhold the love and compassion, you used to give so freely! That was, quite honestly, the way to be with your husband and children. Please know, that as much as you "feel" you are going through, so are they and none of them, as well as you, know how to deal with everything properly!
Chrissy, let some of the "stuff" go and hold on to the love and compassion! My goodness, don't forget to pray constantly!

His Word says, he will never leave you or forsake you, so continue to trust HIM for that!

Hey girl take it easy and give some wiggle room, for just awhile, until you and your family get used to this new "stage" in your life! Please, Please, PLEASE don't forget to enjoy it!

Let go of the details of the processes and policies for a moment, yep, I saw that today too!
I love you, I really do, I just don't like who you are right now!


  1. A wise person once reminded me to be kind and gentle to myself.

  2. What a profound letter to yourself. So wise. This is one of the many times that your words have touched my heart, Chrissy. I'm so proud to know you.

  3. What a profound letter to yourself. So wise. This is one of the many times that your words have touched my heart, Chrissy. I'm so proud to know you.