This is just an outlet for me, to be able to get my thoughts out! I am a Woman, Wife and Mommy that also works outside the home! Just me trying to make it all work for the best for my family and myself! Just my journey!

Friday, October 31, 2008

13 and there's still the first time for....


Adam dressed up in a scary costume for Halloween, that was a first! Then he went to the school Halloween Dance. He went to this dance with many of his friends and it sounds like he really enjoyed himself. As we dropped him off, we all became a little nervous, some of the kids didn't have on costumes, but as we sat and observed for a moment we realized, most of the kids dressed in Halloween costumes, there were only a few that did not (party poopers)! Adam got out of the car and headed into the dance! I was so impressed at how the school handled the dance and how the Student Council put it on! Adam did invite one of his friends, who is a girl, to go with him and hang out, she agreed! I was surprised to hear that Adam danced, Fast danced and really didn't leave the dance floor much! He wasn't into mom chasing him with a camera into the school, so this is the best shot I could get of him going into his first dance!! Not at all the picture I wanted, but at least it is something. All together a great experience for both him and I. A new first! Such fun!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

A Little of This and A Little of That

We have been "dog sitting" Tinkerbell, the dog in the last post, for a little while. She has been in our home since Papa's last surgery in September. We have really enjoyed watching her, but she does belong to my MIL and she missed her and came to get her the other day! Tinker is a dog that is high-maintenance and requires lots of brushing (we are not very good at keeping up with a high maintenance dog). I think my MIL was horrified when she saw how "bad" Tinker's hair was and how truly spoiled she got here. So home they went! We are all sad to see her go, but happy the Gramma is ready to take on her dog again (I think they missed each other)! Thanks for the visit Tinker, it was fun, we loved having you!!

I'll fill in on the children another day, they all require their own entry on what is going on in their lives! I sure do love being their mom and watching them grow up, but I know I always miss where they were, I can never wait to see where they are going and who they are becoming, however, I always miss where they were!!!!

I have been given the opportunity to be on the Rule Scholars Team at work! I am so excited! There is a team of about 6 of us, 2 mechanical, 2 TYE, and 2 MOW! We all work together and study our rules and policies and then we compete with other divisions! It is an awesome opportunity! The studying has begun. The competition takes place in January in Fort Worth! Yes, I will have to leave again, but it is a short trip! Maybe my family can come with me this time, depends on the air fare, we'll see!

I turned into the Snippy Icing Lady today at the kids school! When I make icing for the kids to decorate cookies, it is not your typical icing! I had to take it to school and did not want to "just drop it off" and let someone else take it down to the class. But I didn't explain my reasons for wanting to deliver it I think I said something like "It's icing, I have to explain to them how to use it" then I think I kind of heard what came out of my mouth and I did make an attempt to recover myself and it went baaaad, really, really baaad, it went something like (in the snottiest tone you can use) "is that o.k. or do you need me to leave it in the office?" Yes, I'll be sending an apology note and flowers to the Personnel in the Office and I will be signing that note: Crazy Nazi Icing Lady! All it will say is: I am so sorry!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Sticking Your Nose Where it Doesn't Belong...

Tinkerbell stuck her head inside a garbage can, which had food in it (upstairs where food isn't supposed to be) and when she pulled her head out she took the garbage can lid with her!!!!

Thursday, October 23, 2008


I love listening to my children when they are getting along. Adam and Mitchell get very very loud when they are playing together, but I still love it. Sometimes, it can be extremely annoying and those are the moments I try to remind myself, this isn't going to be like this for very long, just listen and enjoy! So I try not to yell at them or get angry, I try just to listen laugh and love. Windy doesn't really ever get loud. But she is in there playing with them.
Studying, studying and studying, some days I feel that is all I do with my children when I am with them, even the phone calls home to check on them are filled with study questions! I am so thankful I know what is going on with them, but at the same time, I just want to say YUK, no more studying.
Paid the kid early allowance this week and late allowance last week! Totally trusting they will complete their chores the rest of this week. Yesterday was such a rough day at work, I needed to be able to reward and celebrate with someone!
My bosses are not very good about introducing people, or even making an opening where I can barge in and introduce myself. If development of people is soooo important to my company, than why isn't introducing the lower people to the HIGHER people a priority? I think someone is a little mixed up here! I stressed myself out so badly at work yesterday I could hardly sleep, only to find out that what I was stressing over wasn't even an issue! This totally stinks. If my boss just would have answered my questions TRUTHFULLY I would have been able to sleep a little better!
Home from work, I checked on each one of my children, which is very normal for me, as soon as I walk in the door, I find their location and what they are doing, and how they are doing it. When I find they are all well, it puts my heart at ease.
As a Foreman, I shouldn't work this hard and my jeans shouldn't be filled with oil and grease, OR should they???

Monday, October 20, 2008

The Dentist

We started getting back on track with the Dentist, YEA!! Adam has ZERO cavities, I am not sure how this works, but he didn't have to go back. Windy has 1 cavity and needed to go back today. Mitchell have 2 cavities, or two sessions with two joining cavities to fill each time! I have gone to one Dentist and went back to pick up my xrays and go to the Dentist the kids are going to. Yep, the Dentist is that good! Windy, Mitchell and I went back today! While I was getting my check up, and moooooooore xrays, the Dentist made it a point to come and tell me how the kids were doing. Everyone had already been numbed and began the fillings. I told him, sorry, I forgot to tell the kids they would be getting a shot, the Dentist replied: "it was probably better because they weren't scared at all" I thought I did something wrong and it turned out to be right, Thank God! Windy did very well. Then it was Mitchell's turn. The assistant came over to talk to me while Mitchell's fillings and baby root canal was going on, she told me "he is the best patient we have had, he is doing so well, is he a real dare devil?" I told her: "not really, he is our baby and he has been treated like our baby!" I felt pretty awesome about my well behaved babies!! Both of the kids were exceptional at this appointment, and Windy even waited in the waiting room, ALONE, and did her homework! After we left the first appointment, when the three kids got check-ups, there was actual arguing going on in the car as to who would go first for their check-ups and cleanings in April!! All of them want to go first! I think the kids have found, FOUND their Dentist. Unfortunately, for the Dentist, I have also FOUND, my Dentist!!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

You can lead..........

As always, in families these days, there is a ton going on. School, homework, friends, parties, chores, you know all the norm. We rely on our parents to help us with the kids, because we both work and I am not ready to turn my oldest into a "permanent babysitter". Which now gives us other challenges, my parents are NOT nearly as "tough" on their grandchildren as they were my sister and I when we were growing up, and I am probably close to being as tough as they were on me, on my kids. Make sense, yep, you get it, my parents have changed and I have taken on their role as parent, and wanting the perfect, responsible children, and yes, they are Peeeeerfect grandparents!! This is difficult when I am not at home at night to help with homework. Most of our discussions about school and homework and chores and friends happen in the morning, when the kids are still in their sleepy fog, just going through the motions getting ready, so after school, everything, EVERYTHING, I said that morning is forgotten. My mom is pretty good about passing on information and holding them accountable, but she also helps them out, I guess that isn't a bad thing.
Now, to where all this is leading:
All my kids are finding this year to be a little bit tougher than last year and their responsibility hasn't matched what it needs to be yet. It kills me, I teach and train and preach responsibility, but when it comes down to it: "you can lead a child through homework, but you can't make them turn it in!" So when they are acing tests and acing labs and failing the class, it just makes me want to throw up my arms, but then the mom in me comes out and says "you need to responsible and turn in your work" then I say "if you get any F's I am going to ground you throughout the entire next quarter!" When I say this, I know I mean it and I know it will be tough, but I don't think Adam cares, maybe he will after week 2 of grounding, then I wonder, does he get it, does he understand grounding and report card grades and responsibility and then I remember he has been train, taught and preached to so here we go.
The other problem:
When a child is grounded so are the parents!! STINKS!!
Good thing is that even though this year is tougher for Windy and Mitchell, they do take their homework seriously and get it done and it stresses them out if they don't! Good.
Then I wonder, the two years I home schooled Adam, did that ruin him? Did it take away responsibility? Then I remember how good those two years were for all of us and how much their dad was working and how we could take off and go meet him for a long lunch or a dinner late at night, and it was OK, 'cause we could do whatever it took to ensure a good class day, the next day! OK so we have some straightening out to do and possibly alot of "home time" coming soon. Guess we will just wait and see and pray and hope and preach and teach and train for the best!!!

Monday, October 13, 2008

10-13 another year

Some days are just tough....
I have never seen this video and it does not match what I picture when I hear it. It does give it a slightly different meaning. Same idea, sad to see them die too young and how we wonder "who you'd be today:
Hard to get through. Some days are tougher than others, even 21 years later. It doesn't get easier, my coping tools just get better, I learn to start praying about the anniversary sooner, I learn to talk more and share more and I learn to tell, those who love me, that I am hurting sooner and not expect them to know, I learn to talk and I learn to remember the good days more than the bad ol' days. The things my family has to go through with me, tough, tough lessons learned to early, for them and for me, far too early. Yes, it definately still hurts and each passing year it gives me a new perspective and a new perspective of respect for my mom and dad, I think sometimes that hurts more than anything. Their hurt had to surpass anything I can imagine! I am in amazement of my parents.
and then God says hey, I don't think you saw this before look at this:

And look who helped find it:
How amazing, this young lady is so much like her namesake and also so much like her mommy!!
The only difference is the age and that she is wearing a helmet, ready to ride the quad and picked a beatiful yellow rose and I would have been wearing my Harley Leather Jacket and my Cheerleading uniform!! Windy is still one of a kind!! Her namesake will always only be one of a kind!!! Windy didn't need the "stuff" to make her own way, she WAS her own way!!!! I can see that My Windy has picked that up from her, the helmet is just a necessity (parents rules) for riding the "toys"!

and look at this they can have fun playing and doing chores:

Sometimes the days and dates just get to me and then God reminds me of how much I have to be thankful for!

Never take family for granted even if that means once in a while you swallow your stupid, stupid pride and say I love you! Never miss that opportunity for today is a GIFT, tomorrow is not promised!

Sunday, October 12, 2008


Don't take this as gloom and doom. This is just it, right on, right now! I will explain more tomorrow!

Sometimes I just focus on this:
and this:
and this:
and this:

and this:
and not this:

and not this:
and not this:

yep, you guessed it, a typical Sunday at my home! Sometimes I need reminded of what is important and what is not!

Saturday, October 11, 2008

It has been a good week...

Started out with following a Sandhill Crane that came to visit us......

He really is in there way out there in the hole you see in the brush. Mitch and I got up every morning on the weekend and searched for him, a couple of times we tried to get closer to take a better picture and we would scare him away, so we admired from afar. Sandhill Cranes migrate through this area both fall and spring more information here!

I was able to send in some pictures to his class, He had fun with that. He was able to lay the pictures out at the back of the classroom for his classmates to take their time looking at them. I was able to visit Mitchell's classroom and tell them about my "job". I think both Mitch and I enjoyed it! I was able, with help from a friend, to let them try on some of the safety "stuff" we use every day on the railroad. We passed around pictures and what was supposed to be 10 minutes turned into an hour!! Fun for both of us.

Yaya continues to find her way and where she wants to belong! I hear her talk about a couple of certain friends and the fun she has on the playground. She tells me that on some days her and about four or five friends, both girls and boys, play football. Funny, I never dreamed of Ya's going out and throwing around a football, but she does and she sounds like she enjoys the fun she has. I don't think it is something she would enjoy being structured, like a football team, but the fun in just running, and playing, maybe tackling!! Every time she tells me about it she smiles, I love that!!

Adam is struggling in school. An F on his interim report has really got us fired up, but because of that report, it opened more and different discussion between myself, Larry and him. He has a plan and seems to be working to make that plan happen. Then his Homeroom teacher called to inform us that Adam is also meeting with him and his teachers to see what and how they can help him. So with everyone on board, including Adam, maybe we will see change and maybe we will figure out what and who can help, if anyone! I know the change from child to young adult was hard, but I really thought it was supposed to be easier for boys. It doesn't seem to be easier, just a bit different. His belief of trust in us as parents is going through a huge change and finding out where that line is between, child/adult, and where he fits in, again!!! This time is a huge challenge for all of us. How much leeway is not enough and how much is too much! What is right for one child isn't right for another. This is tough, as a parent. I can't compare my childhood to his because it is so different and my husband can't compare either. We have to raise him as his own! I know I love him and don't want to steer him wrong, but I also know I love him and want to steer and guide him right!! Wow, this stuff is tough!

They really do grow up far to fast.

Monday, October 6, 2008

He hung up on me!!

OK. New one, I asked the little one to go back to the other house with me and he said NOOOOO!! I pressed and asked why about 3-4 times, he finally responded with
"that town/city is dirty I said what about (different) town/city?" to which the little one responded "I am not going it is dirty too!" the next thing I heard was nothing, a click and nothing, I said hello, like 4 times and then I heard a dial tone, guess he doesn't want to go to the old house!!

Funny thing is, that if the older two children would have done that to me I would have "ripped them a new one!!" Instead I called the little one's father and said "(Ha Ha Ha ha) he hung up on me, the little one hung up on me, he didn't want to go to the old house because, that town, is dirty!" Funny thing is Daddy laughed to! Did it hurt either of us, it wasn't going to change anything, with him, but with the first two, it would have been life changing! OK so I have changed my thought pattern a little, but not a ton!

Garage at the old house still got cleaned out, probably better with only the older two there and not having the little one! Sometimes a hang up is good!

Saturday, October 4, 2008

I Think it is Worth Sharing Again

As I have pondered this post since I posted it, the second time, I have come up with a few thoughts I want to share, before you read it.

10-4 is the date, and that is great that it also means, I've got it, I understand, and OK. Now, that I use a radio at work everyday, this makes even more sense. But, here it is, even though "10-4" only happens once a year, I think it is a reminder of what God is saying to us everyday during, at the end, in the middle and quite honestly everytime we say AMEN in our prayers, or during the day when we are "praying without ceasing"!

Another thought that comes to mind is during Bill Engvall's little blurb on men and women,(where he talks about his friend getting a divorce) to me this basically states, here it is! Which is how I usually pray, here it is and God doesn't ask any questions he doesn't make any comments, He simply let's us end when we end and is already handling the situation and needs no further help on our part!!

Here's the other thought I had, and I did have several (I really am being short), we honor those who go away from the country to defend us and I think we do a decent job of it, we send them emails and video of what is going on and how we appreciate the work they are doing, but it is seldom, rare even, when we thank the police officers who protect, to the point of giving their life, us from the evils right here in our own America. Hard as that may seem, when you getting pulled over to get a ticket for speeding or not stopping completely for a stop sign, it is very true. Maybe, just maybe the next time you see a cop on the street, doing his/her job, you will thank them for their commitment to keep our Country as safe as they can! And Maybe, please maybe, you will tell them 10-4, I understand what you are doing and I support you, even if that means paying the fine I have been given, in order so that next time I follow the rules, to keep our Country as safe as we can!
My thoughts are long winded I know! On to the story.....

I posted this story last year, but it is such a good memory at a time where most of my memories are very bad, and sad so I'll post it again.

Here is a link to a story to show what is going on in Texas to honor those Officer's killed in the line of duty.

I have a story to tell,

Here goes:October 4, 1988
San Antonio, Texas During a Murder Trial Trial it was against a Serial Killer that killed a Beaumont Police Officer in early 1988.
A little detail behind:
This police officer was on his way home to his wife and two girls and he noticed a car that looked out of place, and found it had been stolen. He followed the car to a hotel, called for backup, and followed the man inside. The man (Michael Lee Lockhart) had pulled a gun on the police officer and shot him and when the police officer begged for him not to shoot again, he did, he shot again and the police officer was fatally wounded just where the bullet proof vest didn't cover. Because of him doing his job even off duty, the man who murdered my sister and another girl murdered in Florida (these are the only two he was convicted of, there are more) was caught and taken off of the streets. Some things you should know: Never kill a police officer in Texas.

Texas rocks in the death penalty, YES, I believe in the death penalty.

My mom and I were "requested" to come and testify against the murder for his "sentencing phase" and we went.

We arrived on October 4th.

I remember meeting lots of people and all very nice.

There was a man there, he was the father of the Police Officer killed in the line of duty. He was a "typical Texan" polite kind and a big man.

We had been chatting for a while and the verdict came back for the trial against the man who murdered his son.

It was guilty, the first guilty verdict that came against him for murder. This Father of the Police Officer said to me: "You know what this means?"

I replied "it means this is going the way we want it to"

His reply was, "Yes, but it also means something else"

I asked "What?"

Mr. Hulsey Sr. said to me "Today is 10-4 a sign from God, to say everything is o.k., 10-4 good buddy, I have it handled, I can do this, a real sign from God, in Police Officer language" Oh, did I mention this man was also a Police Officer?!I can't help but to smile on 10-4, no matter what is going on or how good or how bad it is, it is 10-4!!