This is just an outlet for me, to be able to get my thoughts out! I am a Woman, Wife and Mommy that also works outside the home! Just me trying to make it all work for the best for my family and myself! Just my journey!

Thursday, November 19, 2009


my heart just aches
my mind hurts
and I don't know what to do
I pray and I pray
God's answer is just wait
My heart aches more
my mind just gives "away"
and I honestly don't know what to do
I pray and I pray
God's answer "I told you just wait"
God's answer to my heart is "I have this, you really just need to wait, there will be no audible answer to your mind or your heart, you will just have to trust ME"
so I trust in Him! My heart and mind will trust in Him!
Both of us and us "one in the same" will wait and trust and know what He is doing is right, for everyone involved!
Honestly, my heart trusts and my heart continually talks to my head! My mind and my heart pray together, understanding, that each contradict one another and also that each, confirm, one another and also that "they" are on the "same path"!!
So many things can mean so differently and mean so the same!
The difference is hearing from the Holy Spirit!


Sunday, November 15, 2009

maybe tomorrow!

I sat down to write a post about our weekend getaway!
After being called for "mom" at least 12 times or more!
A husband shouting at the TV, I usually tolerate his yelling when I am watching with him, this time it annoyed me!
Then the flipping of the channels on the TV (yes we have one computer in an open family room, so no one is "alone" on the computer)!
Then the silly dog "farted" behind me and he totally stinks! Really really bad! Whew!
Then another kid with a "coughing" issue!
Now, I have to pee!
Maybe tomorrow, during the day, I can post about our weekend getaway!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

The Heart and Head Don't Always Agree

As I say goodbye to a man who was a HUGE part of my life, my head knows "I did right" my heart isn't quite as sure!
It makes my heart hurt and my head spin! Got alot of praying and a bit of figuring and a ton of deciphering in my future!
One thing my head and my heart agree on right now is that, I was honestly loved by him and I honestly loved him back! Another thing my heart and head agree on is the love for the family and friends I have gained and loved because of Phil! I will always be thankful for my time with him and for the love and compassion he has always shown me! For the "push-past-itness" he trained me in!
Thank you Phil for the life lessons you have taught me and continue too!
I love you and will miss you!
My friend, my mentor, my Step-dad!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

He's Off By Himself

I sent Adam to meet family in DC! He flew on a plane all by himself! We were able to drop him off right at the gate and Uncle Tony was at the gate in DC waiting for him, so he wasn't really alone, except on his flight.

I was concerned, not that the family I was sending him to wouldn't take good care of him, I was just concerned that he was leaving me all by himself. He did it. He went and everything went well. I hear he was very well behaved and thoroughly enjoyed himself!

He saw so many of the sights, he was able to enjoy his cousins and his Aunt and Uncle without Mom and Dad "hanging" over his shoulder. He was able to trick-or-treat with his cousins, wearing his Uncle's Air Force Uniform, how cool is that!

He was only gone for a few days and they packed as much as they could into that time. The day I picked him up from the airport, I don't know if he was smiling bigger, because of his experience or if I was! I was so blessed by him being able to go and the respect and maturity he showed why he was away. I wasn't sure how well he would do, that far away from home. He is also, very comfortable with his Aunt and Uncle, so I was concerned it would cause him to relax and not be on his best behavior! Boy, was I wrong (or someone is lying to me)!! Turns out he was able to surpass what expectations I had for him and in turn I was blessed! I love it!

I think part of the key to keeping him happy was feeding him often!!

Pretty neat experience for all of us, we all learned something new about ourselves and each other.