Today, so many great things happened! I really can't get them off my mind and my heart!
First, let me remember where I thought I was!
My best friend is Larbo! I went through a spell, for the past couple of years, curious, if I relied on him too much. I really wondered if he, really got everything or even he even cared about everything that I do!
I have also been REALLY angry, over the years, that my best friend or who I thought would be my best friend for life (bff, bestie) is gone and I have never found a replacement for her! Not that a replacement is what I have been looking for, it's honestly just the fact that who I thought would be here at my side and my BFF and my Bestie isn't here and that's something I never planned for and haven't gotten used to!
I have been jealous, over the years, of sister relationships! When I say jealous, I mean, really, upset and angry jealous! I really mean that, two-year old, tantrum throwin' "it's not fair, I had that and now it's gone!!!" Wow, what a moment for me, I really admitted, some major jealousy to myself here! Sadly, I have also been blessed with a MIL with lots of sisters and a close family, sadly I have always been a bit selfish as I have watched their interaction over the years! I get soo angry with myself over it! I knew I should be enjoying the relationshiop my MIL shares with her sisters and to "some degree" I did, but never all the way! What I was missing still hurt and this was a constant reminder of what could have been and what was stolen! Yep, hard stuff! Jealousy is so hard, it's not only an emotion, it's a passionate emotion and it is a party to hatred and it is a reality, a reality I know I have to face and deal with and never to surrender to (although I have a few times)!
Today I had a chance to meet with a friend that I haven't been face-to-face with in years!!!!! Through FB we have chatted lately, but today, I got to hug her and meet her and talk, talk face-to-face! I am so blessed! It really felt as though, we were just catching up. It's amazing when you share a love between friendships and pick it back up, some 20+ years later! I am honestly in awe of the restoration of true friendships, even after years and years. My day could have stopped there and I was already "over the top"!
I looked over my friends shoulder to see, two other friends, they are sisters, and they were sharing a meal together! They were chatting and laughing and even got serious a time or two! Yes, I did stop to watch. This is what I usually do, when I find sisters enjoying one another. On one-hand I really enjoy watching the relationship of sisters and on the other hand it makes me think about what is gone. Then still, it makes me remember what I had! I am so blessed by what I had!
But today was different! I just enjoyed seeing them and seeing them spend time together! I was blessed by the fact that they were sisters and blessed by one another and also that they had embraced that relationship!
My AHA moment
I wasn't, in the least bit jealous! I wasn't angry or sad and I wasn't thinking about what I was missing! I was enjoying their time together (I guess you could say I was dropping in on their time). It wasn't until a couple of hours later that I realized what had happened today. After all the years of praying the jealousy away, and trying to work through it, without even knowing it, the jealousy was gone! I was able to simply enjoy the blessings one sister brings to another! I wasn't angry or mad or sad, just really blessed!
My meet up with my friend is a different story for a different day. Not that it was any less of a blessing. That meet up has many more words to it and many more years behind it and in front of us! I am a lucky girl, a blessed young lady (I like calling myself a young lady!!!) God is good, He really does restore all!