To DAD

I posted this about 2 years ago, but I have the perfect opportunity and good reasons to post it again!

My Dad just celebrated his 60th Birthday! I am so proud and amazed by the obstacles he has made it through! He is an awesome father and an amazing Grandpa! I am so proud to call him Dad!
Happy Birthday Dad!
TO MY DAD, my amazing, awesome, wonderful dad and to the GREATEST GRANDPA EVER:
This is his Yard Railroad and it has grown and transformed since these pics, I'll try and get some new ones on here soon!!

This is a special one for me. I am so proud of my dad. Early in my marriage I went a long time with watching my dad fight a huge battle and for an even longer time just giving in to it. We have become so close in the past 6 years it is amazing. God does restore relationships, he is good for his Word, always.

Another cool thing about this is that my children absolutely adore him and could never imagine the man I sometimes recall (just so they know how far and how strong my dad is) and tell stories about.

My dad was a good father, but got lost in some things that happened and had a hard time figuring out how to cope and tried to cope in ways that really hurt himself.

Anyway, this is a passion my dad has found in the past couple of years. G gauge trains. He said he wanted to build this track and scenery in his backyard. I honestly thought it would take him at least a couple of years!!! I would say it has probably taken him less than this one summer!!!!!!

I think this is so cool, it is awesome to sit around and watch the two trains go by and see what my dad has put together with his own two hands! It made me want to share it!
Here is a picture of the bridge that he built himself over the pond and water fall he put in.

These pictures just don't do this train justice! It is still "a work in progress" I think if he were done, it could be finished, there is still so many more ideas in his head.

As you can see it is also something my children enjoy.

When we get to his house to visit, suitcases get dropped wherever (unless mom reminds them to take them in) They are on to the train. He lets them rearrange the buildings, houses and people.

When they go to train shows it is a challenge for them to find the right size pieces. It is very neat to hear my kids talk about what deals and what kind of stuff they found for the trains.

My dad has really made them feel apart of this project.

I am just so impressed by my father and the fight

he has fought and how well he continues to fight. I am so thankful for him and the restoration God has given us.

I am so close to my dad, I talk to him daily

now!! My dad is a kind and gentle man that has come through some things the hard way. He is a fighter and enjoys helping others through their battles. I am impressed by the way he doesn't hide from what he has gone through, but shares it with those who need to hear! He is a man that doesn't give up easily, on himself and on others he gives until it hurts and helps until he truly cannot any longer and to the point of hurting himself!! I just cannot tell you how impressed I am by my fathers will to fight and press on and through and passed.

Dad, this one is dedicated to you. I LOVE YOU!

I am so proud of you. I enjoy the relationship we have and even more the relationship you enjoy with Adam, Windy, Mitchell and Larry it gives me an overwhelming JOY!!!

I Am Ready

I am ready for a change, in my career! I am ready for a new challenge and I am ready for more of the railroad and what it has to offer and teach me! I am ready!

A new position posted on the web some time while I was on vacation and was still on there (for only one more day) when I returned to work!

This sounded like a great stepping stone for me, in my career! I was ready and I applied! I was so excited when I found a response in my email the very next day and I would be able to interview for this position! I was soooo sure it was right and that it would be a great way to "round out" my mechanical knowledge! Wohoo, God is good all the time! I would apply for this position that was on car-side, I currently work locomotive side! This is an awesome opportunity and at such a time where there are layoffs and furloughs and hiring freezes, whew, I beat the, or shall I say, God beat the world at it's own game again! The world has no hold on what God can do! I am going forth and doing more and bigger and better!

The interview, I thought, went well and left me even more excited!

Only to hear the very next morning, at 6am, on the AM conference call, that the position (my stepping stone position) went to someone else!

My heart, sorta dropped and sorta stayed up and going, like I knew this was only a test!! I didn't tell my boss, I had heard who got the position or that I knew it didn't go to me! I simply said "see ya later" walked out the door and headed to the service track office!

I called hubby, as soon as I walked out the door of the Roundhouse office! All I said, "I didn't get it" no tears, no nervousness, just real matter of fact, I didn't get it! I moved on and went to work!

Then I started reanalyzing my interview, I couldn't find much that I thought I had done wrong!

The interviewer, then showed up on Locomotive side (he is a car-side guy and we don't mix too much only because our jobs have us going different directions) and he asked me if I had a minute! Hmmm, of course I have a minute, you are the man I would love to work for right now and I am sad that I don't get to! So the question: Do you have a minute? is totally unnecessary!

I sit down in my boss' office with the boss I want to have and this gentleman gives me pointers on how to interview better the next time! HA, I am completely shocked and thankful! Are you serious, this man is going to help me make sure I secure the next position I apply for and he has the nerve to ask me if I have a minute!

Truth be known, I am little let down, but not held back, down or out, this only promotes my thoughts to "wow God, what is it you have for my next career move?"

This is Not How it Was Planned.....Part 3 and final or not!!

I wrote in Part 1 how my family and I planned and wrote in Part 2 how I continued to plan..........I write in Part 3 how I continued to plan............

I continued to adjust and plan and celebrate the life I was going to lead, or so I thought (I really thought I had everything figured out)!

Mom divorced dad and 11 days after the divorce was final, I walked into our apartment, to find my sister had been murdered. Not just beaten or shot but, violently abused and stabbed and murdered.
My big sister was gone, the one who made my friends for me and helped me plan my life, the one who made it a point to help others and found it necessary to make good grades and made a stand by being an "upstanding young woman"! The lessons my big sister is still teaching me is amazing! My big sister has always been and will always be my best friend. I have found many good friends and have found amazing friends, my husband is my best friend for me as a wife, but to be that "bestest" never! It is very difficult to explain the loss and the pit that stands in my heart, but it has been there for almost 22 years and I am sure it will always be there! I am whole, regardless of the pit, but there is a piece always aching and missing. I know those of you who have lost someone close know exactly the place I am at.

My life changed and transformed, I met amazin people and saw the beauty and the awe inside people and friends that wouldn't have come out, otherwise.

I did go onto college and I did become a Chef and I did "help" someone open a restaurant, I was involved in every part of the restaurant opening. It was fun and somewhat fulfulling, but definately not what I was looking for, not that life fulfilling, "I did it" moment!

I went on to marry my husband Larry and we have 3 beautiful amazing children together. I have met and become friends with so many "good" people along the way. I have been loved and given love in a more free matter than before.

Would I change the circumstances of what happened?

Sure I would, if I could guarantee the outcome!

I am just not sure I am willing and selfless enough, to give up what I have been given. I love my sister Windy and I miss her everyday, EVERY DAY, without fail. I miss being a sister and an Auntie, sometimes. However, I have been given so much grace, it is unbelievable, I have 4 neices and two nephews and two amazing sisters, that were cousins before hand.

I do believe God puts things together before we even know what's happening. My mom encouraged a relationship between my cousins and I and my sister long before we ever knew why it was important.

I have had amazing friends that have been in my life for a long time and some that have come later, but none who have left my heart and my mind. Once I meet a good person and friend that's where they are and I never stop thinking about them!

If I could have the life that I have and have my sister and her family involved and we would all be very close, I would accept the change, but there is no guarantee of that!

I was had a very good friend tell me, "God really knows what he is doing" and that I believe! I believe he keeps me close and has Angels around myself and my family, I believe that when my heart aches the most, is when I am hearing from my Angels and want them to transform and allow me to hug them, but I also believe that when that happens, I should be extending myself to hug someone else! I know it doesn't make sense to most, but it totally makes sense to me!

I believe that sharing stories, good and bad, allows me to become closer to my friends that are sharing them. I know there are so many people I still haven't met that have a story to share about Windy and I can't wait to hear them.

I also believe that as my children grow and I relate the stories of my sisters life and my life to them, they will show me, the true love of siblings and God will allow me to share in their "moments" and love on them while they are going through it! That these moments will help me through my on going grief.

I also believe that as my children share in the lives of their cousins, we are transforming, what it means to be a Gallagher! To be from the Gallagher family together will mean a life of closeness and kindness!! The life I remember my mom and their moms instilling! As we move on and forward, we have and will continue to change things for the better!

I don't like how I got to, where I am, but I woulndn't change it for anything! There isn't any way for me to go back in time and change things, so this is where I tell you that believe that "all things work together for the greater good of those who love HIM"! I honestly believe that, but sometimes, I have to pray for my unbelief.

Truth is, I am thankful for the life I have and I am thankful for the friends and family I have and I honestly miss my sister daily and I miss the friends I have lost to death in the process. There isn't a day that my heart doesn't ache, there isn't a day that I am not thankful for where I am and there isn't a day that I do think and pray for those who have helped to change my life "for the greater good of those who love HIM"!

It never stops hurting!

Happy Birthday Adam

I am taking a short break from the previous posts, to tell my oldest Happy Birthday!

Adam turned 14 on the 27th!

I am blessed and shocked by this!
You never believe or even understand how fast time will go when they are first born and everyone tells you "the time will fly"!
The time has flown.
I have told you all about our crazy year with Adam and I have asked you to pray and God answered our prayers......
Adam is an 8th grader!
I am so thankful. Now, let me tell you about some of the great things God has placed in Adam!

Adam is an amazing young man, with a heart of gold and passion for people! He honestly wants to see people do well and wants to be apart of helping them achieve their goals!
I can remember going out with Adam when he was, I think 9, and he collected food and money from our neighbors to help get our food pantry at our church (at that time) started! He went to every door and explained what he was doing and asked for our neighbors help! I think every person in our neighborhood donated something to the food pantry. We went to church that night and Adam gave his donations and expected nothing in return! It was a beautiful and proud moment in my life as his mom! Adam has given me so many more of those moments, as I sit here and think on them, I am truly blessed!
Some of these moments, are as simple as holding the door for other people, he never misses the chance!
At Adam's young age, he understands that people need people! He gets it and he promotes it.
Adam loves to work with his hands and does at every chance he can, it is so neat to watch him work with his dad, my dad or my FIL and chatting with them the entire time. He speaks of promises, truth and love to them, simply beautiful!
Adam is an honest blessing and continues to offer hope and love to others. I am so thankful to be apart of his life and his love! I am truly blessed by him every day and I thank God for bringing him into my life, I couldn't have planned it better. God really knows what He is doing!
Happy Birthday Adam, I love you!!!

This is Not How it Was Planned.....Part 2

So this is surely NOT the way we as a family planned it.
I'll continue.......
We left after planning our futures as a family, I believe, we all honestly believed that is how it would go! So NOT the way things went!
I remember being asked how many kids I would have, when I got married! Ha, I would laugh, I wasn't getting married and I wasn't having children. There wasn't any room in my life, as we had planned it, for children and a silly husband!
A short time after this dinner, in 1987, my parents divorced. The divorce was welcomed, by both my sister and I!

Can you see the plan starting to fall apart!?

My parents were great parents together and separate, just in their own timing! They had good days/years and bad days/years!

I can remember, returning home with my sister (after an evening out with friends) we were teenagers at this point 14 and 15 (I think) and mom and my sister, Windy, having words, or an argument is a better way to put it! Mom was upset, I think we were a little late (we were never ever really late, mom wouldn't stand for that) not sure why we were late, but we did have very responsible friends that returned us home, on time and safe, time after time, so there must have been a good reason! Windy was trying to make her point and mom was trying to make her point! Add in the stress of an alcoholic husband/father and a failing business (my dads, because of alcohol) and Mom making all the money in the household, this equals, an opportunity, to lose it! Mom did, but in a good way, Windy lost it too, but in a good way! My cousin Keith and I stood and watched the argument unfold in amazement!
The next day, my mom took both Windy and I to see an apartment. Mom's words "I have put the security deposit and two months rent down and I am hoping you girls will come with me!?" I jumped at the chance for change and Windy had a look of utter relief in her eyes! No more late night fights, no more bill collectors, no more wondering where dad is, no more, no more, no more of the junk!
We went home, to the family home and began collecting and packing over the next couple of weeks!
This is not how I planned it!
My heart ached and felt joy at the same time!

Blunt

I have seen the goodness of the good people that surround so many of us, time and time again. You always rise to the occasion, whether it is joyful or sorrowful. You have always amazed and inspired me. I myself, have been truly blessed by your love and friendship and how easily you share that!
I shared with a friend, not that long ago, about the goodness of the people that surround us and I realize I need to share that with all of you.
So many times, we can get stuck on the bad driver, or the mean check out person, or the bad waitress, or the person that did something horrible, that we forget to stop and look around and realize, for that one person, there are several around us that are just beautiful, wonderful, caring, kind and loving.
Being completely blunt, all I can say is: I LOVE YOU honestly, I have been blessed by so many good people and awesome relationships, that I can't ever say I Love you and thank you all enough times!!!


Thanks so much to all those for your prayers for the family I posted about previously.
Please continue to pray for them and continue to pray for the family of my friend that passed, last January. Both these amazing men, have left behind a wife and children and numerous family and friends that miss them terribly, So please continue to pray with me and believe with me for peace and comfort.
Without all of you, I know I wouldn't be where I am today! I have and continue to see and feel the love of good people!

Please Please Please Pray For My Friends

I am so sad that a friend of mine and Larry passed away Sunday. He was very young, only 35 and a Husband and Father to two 4 year old babies, a girl and a boy!
He was an amazing man.
He was an amazing friend.
Even more he was smitten with his wife of almost 13 years.
He was an awesome older brother to 4, four, sisters and he did it well!
He was an amazing son to his Mom and Dad.
He made so many people smile and helped so many.
He truly was a giver in this world.
Our world is a better place because God allowed him to us for a short time.
I am a better person, because of the time that he invested in me.
And there are so many more that same the same thing.

So here is my request:
Pray for comfort and peace for Dave's family. Pray for his two children. Pray for his 4 sisters. Pray for his loving Wife. Just pray pray pray. When you think of me or RRR or rippin or runnin or roarin, please pray for these people.
God is definitely their comforter and they know it and God is ABSOLUTELY their peacemaker and all their faith is in HIM!
They just honestly need to be surrounded by prayer. To lose such a young man, with such a big heart and wisdom and joy beyond his years, is a hard loss and his family needs your prayers.
God is with us!
He is my comforter.