The white couch, in front of the big picture window. We have two wing back chairs, one on either side of the couch and two round tables covered in mauve table cloths! I can see my neighbors bi level across the way, just to the right of our big tree in our front yard!
Start the assignment:
My first couch that we purchased for our new home, after we were married. I picked it out at Wards, in the clearance section, and then called hubby and he approved it and we loaded it up and took it home! Our home seemed so large. We put it in our living room, where we only entertain once-in-a-while guests and there's no TV in the room. The couch is white and I love it and I only sit on it when company visits. I watch Papaw come over and hold Adam until he falls asleep or they both fall asleep sitting on the white couch, Adam sprawled over Papaw's belly. A small break from a colicky baby.
Later, I am at a women's retreat and hear a poem about eating popcorn on a white couch and it changed my thoughts immediately. I couldn't wait to get home to share.....
My 3 minutes are up.
I performed this writing exercise with pen and paper, to ensure no "backspace" editing. I set a timer and then just wrote. I transferred it word for word here.]
The Assignment:
Here's how it goes: With pen and paper, make a list of ten couches you've known in your lifetime. (This also works with other words, but couches are my favorite because they are central to many moments in your memory.)
When you've made your list, take a deep relaxing breath and find the couch that has the most powerful emotional charge for you. Then begin writing about it in the present tense. Describe the scene.
What's behind you? In front of you? To your left? To your right? Above you? Below you?
Who is there? What are they saying? How does the scene unfold?
Keep writing for three minutes until you've reached the end of the vignette. Keep the pen moving. Three minutes will seem like a long time. But don't stop. If you run out of words, doodle a little till they come again.
Don't edit! Keep the memory and emotion there in all its raw glory!"
This was neat assignment, I could go on! It really got me thinking! Thanks Stephanie for the challenge!
Monday, March 8, 2010
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Long Line Of Love
As I am helping in the planning of a special anniversary, I realize what a special legacy I get to follow!
Many of my family members have been married for more than just a short time! They have stood, pushed past and found what it means to love and keep on loving! During the good and the bad, the healthy and the sick, the richer and poorer! They have done it and they have set the path for myself and so many others in the family! I am absolutely amazed and impressed by the heart of those who have and continue to put effort into their marriage!
To say it is one thing, to watch is another, to live it is completely different!
I remember a few years back, celebrating my in-laws 40th anniversary and how blessed I was by their celebration! I was also blessed by them making it through, what I knew as tough stuff, at the time! Truth be told!
Can I be completely honest?
Like I need an answer to that question!
The longer a marriage lasts just shows how much more work goes on! Then you add, raising children, having careers, owning homes, individual goals and couple goals, then you add goals for your children (that they may or may not reach), then you the whole sickness and health, then add daily life! Now you have a constant goal, constant struggle, a constant unending path, full of effort!
Quite honestly, the goal of a marriage making it, is a goal with unending struggles and changes! 15 years ago, I would have told you: if we make it through 5 years we've got it!
10 years ago, I would have told you: if we make it through the next 5, we've got it!
5 years ago, I would have told you: if we make it through the next 5, we've got it!
Last year I would have told you: if we make it past 17 years, I will consider our marriage a success!
My parents were divorced at 17 years of marriage and I do consider it a blessing that they are divorced! My opinion is, they are far better divorced than they ever were married! You would have to live in my house to know what that statement means!
Now what I have learned, there are many marriages that make it and make it well! Not without struggle and not without concern, but they make it!
Quite honestly, the numbers were always numbers, when I went into marriage, it wasn't lightly and it wasn't on a whim, it was for a lifetime and I believe my husband went into it with the same belief!
But what our family has shown us, is that it not only, can be done, but it can be done with dignity, style and grace! Not without work and struggle!
See, I come from a long line of love and that's an awesome legacy to follow!
Many of my family members have been married for more than just a short time! They have stood, pushed past and found what it means to love and keep on loving! During the good and the bad, the healthy and the sick, the richer and poorer! They have done it and they have set the path for myself and so many others in the family! I am absolutely amazed and impressed by the heart of those who have and continue to put effort into their marriage!
To say it is one thing, to watch is another, to live it is completely different!
I remember a few years back, celebrating my in-laws 40th anniversary and how blessed I was by their celebration! I was also blessed by them making it through, what I knew as tough stuff, at the time! Truth be told!
Can I be completely honest?
Like I need an answer to that question!
The longer a marriage lasts just shows how much more work goes on! Then you add, raising children, having careers, owning homes, individual goals and couple goals, then you add goals for your children (that they may or may not reach), then you the whole sickness and health, then add daily life! Now you have a constant goal, constant struggle, a constant unending path, full of effort!
Quite honestly, the goal of a marriage making it, is a goal with unending struggles and changes! 15 years ago, I would have told you: if we make it through 5 years we've got it!
10 years ago, I would have told you: if we make it through the next 5, we've got it!
5 years ago, I would have told you: if we make it through the next 5, we've got it!
Last year I would have told you: if we make it past 17 years, I will consider our marriage a success!
My parents were divorced at 17 years of marriage and I do consider it a blessing that they are divorced! My opinion is, they are far better divorced than they ever were married! You would have to live in my house to know what that statement means!
Now what I have learned, there are many marriages that make it and make it well! Not without struggle and not without concern, but they make it!
Quite honestly, the numbers were always numbers, when I went into marriage, it wasn't lightly and it wasn't on a whim, it was for a lifetime and I believe my husband went into it with the same belief!
But what our family has shown us, is that it not only, can be done, but it can be done with dignity, style and grace! Not without work and struggle!
See, I come from a long line of love and that's an awesome legacy to follow!
Saturday, March 6, 2010
A Good Laugh
Soooo thankful this work-week is coming to an end for me!
It felt as though I was being pulled harder in all directions this week. Hopefully, I'll be able to regroup and get-it-together for the next week, tomorrow.
This picture always makes me laugh and that's exactly what I need this evening!
I was baking and Mitchy came in to "help"! Back then I was selling wedding cakes and baked goods! I'm not quite sure what I was making or who or what I was doing it for! What I do remember is the bowl of chocolate and scooping cookies! My kitchen was a SMALL runway kitchen back then, so I used the dining room attached to the kitchen for extra counter space! I was in the kitchen, probably getting another batch of whatever and turned to find this lil guy covered in chocolate and happy as can be! So I grabbed my camera, snapped a picture and I'm not sure, but I don't think Mitchy was disciplined in the slightest!
Unfortunately, the lesson of grabbing the camera and not sweating this kinda stuff was learned the "hard way"! I remember Adam, he had to be, mmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaybe two. I was doing a wedding cake for a family member and she was having a ginormous wedding, I think 350! Anyhow, same scenario as Mitchy's escapade, I was using the kitchen and dining room to work and working quite hard! I had just taken 'baby gates' down and let Adam in with me, after all he's such a good boy and so obedient!! I walked to the kitchen to get more of whatever I turned around and found Adam covered in icing! One side of a decorated cake completely swiped with finger prints and Adam sitting on the floor with an entire bowl of icing saying "mmmm, mmmm, mmm, mm"! Although I did laugh at him and joke about how cute he was, I didn't get out the camera and snap some photos! I vividly remember a dollop of icing on his inner thigh, with a stainless steel bowl, full of icing in between his legs, hands totally covered, and his mouth full of icing!
See a good laugh! That's what I needed!
It felt as though I was being pulled harder in all directions this week. Hopefully, I'll be able to regroup and get-it-together for the next week, tomorrow.
This picture always makes me laugh and that's exactly what I need this evening!
I was baking and Mitchy came in to "help"! Back then I was selling wedding cakes and baked goods! I'm not quite sure what I was making or who or what I was doing it for! What I do remember is the bowl of chocolate and scooping cookies! My kitchen was a SMALL runway kitchen back then, so I used the dining room attached to the kitchen for extra counter space! I was in the kitchen, probably getting another batch of whatever and turned to find this lil guy covered in chocolate and happy as can be! So I grabbed my camera, snapped a picture and I'm not sure, but I don't think Mitchy was disciplined in the slightest!
Unfortunately, the lesson of grabbing the camera and not sweating this kinda stuff was learned the "hard way"! I remember Adam, he had to be, mmmmmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaybe two. I was doing a wedding cake for a family member and she was having a ginormous wedding, I think 350! Anyhow, same scenario as Mitchy's escapade, I was using the kitchen and dining room to work and working quite hard! I had just taken 'baby gates' down and let Adam in with me, after all he's such a good boy and so obedient!! I walked to the kitchen to get more of whatever I turned around and found Adam covered in icing! One side of a decorated cake completely swiped with finger prints and Adam sitting on the floor with an entire bowl of icing saying "mmmm, mmmm, mmm, mm"! Although I did laugh at him and joke about how cute he was, I didn't get out the camera and snap some photos! I vividly remember a dollop of icing on his inner thigh, with a stainless steel bowl, full of icing in between his legs, hands totally covered, and his mouth full of icing!
See a good laugh! That's what I needed!
Empathy
Most of the day I kept thinking about how we can never, ever be totally empathetic with anyone! There is no way that we have ever been through all the exact same circumstances, at the exact same age, dealing with the exact same other circumstances, with the exact same mind set, at the exact day!
Sympathetic is easy, especially when you like the person you have sympathy for. Empathetic will never happen completely, for any of us! That word "empathy" gets thrown around alot these days, I'm not really sure how it can be thrown around when you really think about the meaning of the word!
empathy em·pa·thy (ěm'pə-thē)
n.
Direct identification with, understanding of, and vicarious experience of another person's situation, feelings, and motives.
This is the definition I was taught and it is still the one I identify with the most! I also remember being told it was like "being able to stand in someone Else's shoes"! Ever notice how someone Else's shoes never fit right, even if they are the right size. Other's shoes are worn in to their feet and their way of walking and the places they walk and have walked!
I'm one of those that want to help others by what I have learned and learn from what others have learned. I know that teaching and learning are both good things and sharing with, should never stop! However, I realize, no matter how much you want to "empathize" with someone or help them, you never truly know what it is they are going through and sometimes, thinking your being empathic just gets in the way! Sometimes, I just need to be there and not have complete understanding and that's OK!
Sympathetic is easy, especially when you like the person you have sympathy for. Empathetic will never happen completely, for any of us! That word "empathy" gets thrown around alot these days, I'm not really sure how it can be thrown around when you really think about the meaning of the word!
empathy em·pa·thy (ěm'pə-thē)
n.
Direct identification with, understanding of, and vicarious experience of another person's situation, feelings, and motives.
This is the definition I was taught and it is still the one I identify with the most! I also remember being told it was like "being able to stand in someone Else's shoes"! Ever notice how someone Else's shoes never fit right, even if they are the right size. Other's shoes are worn in to their feet and their way of walking and the places they walk and have walked!
I'm one of those that want to help others by what I have learned and learn from what others have learned. I know that teaching and learning are both good things and sharing with, should never stop! However, I realize, no matter how much you want to "empathize" with someone or help them, you never truly know what it is they are going through and sometimes, thinking your being empathic just gets in the way! Sometimes, I just need to be there and not have complete understanding and that's OK!
Friday, March 5, 2010
It's For Me, Not About Me
I'm being worked on and I'm working on myself in so many ways right now! Because of that I am not sure which end is up!
As I was driving home this evening, I noticed how big and beautiful the partial moon was! I found myself saying to myself, this must be God's way of giving back the sunshine we have been missing out on! It was a sunshiny day and a moon shiny night.
But, by the time I got home to take a picture of it, this is what I got!
My thought immediately changed to, what a difference in the moon in just a few miles. Then I started to wonder how big the moon may look to others. Then I realized, this is just as life, my big moon, my awe moment, my vision, my view, my take, is only mine! As much as I want others to be in the same place and see the same thing, this was only for me!
Then I started hearing my own words, "not everything is about you" and then I heard this but, "this is for you, to encourage you"!
That mountain of self sabotage that was in front of me, is now a hill and I can climb a hill! Don't get me wrong, I can climb a mountain if necessary, but a hill is less work and I take my reprieve where it is!
As I was driving home this evening, I noticed how big and beautiful the partial moon was! I found myself saying to myself, this must be God's way of giving back the sunshine we have been missing out on! It was a sunshiny day and a moon shiny night.
But, by the time I got home to take a picture of it, this is what I got!
My thought immediately changed to, what a difference in the moon in just a few miles. Then I started to wonder how big the moon may look to others. Then I realized, this is just as life, my big moon, my awe moment, my vision, my view, my take, is only mine! As much as I want others to be in the same place and see the same thing, this was only for me!
Then I started hearing my own words, "not everything is about you" and then I heard this but, "this is for you, to encourage you"!
That mountain of self sabotage that was in front of me, is now a hill and I can climb a hill! Don't get me wrong, I can climb a mountain if necessary, but a hill is less work and I take my reprieve where it is!
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Sabotage
I have learned something new about myself lately. Maybe I have noticed it before, but now I recognize it!
I sabotage myself, constantly!
I can't believe I am actually saying this!
It's true, it's very honestly true!
I sabotage myself in going forward in so many goals!
It is beyond me, that someone who is soooo goal oriented as I am, can constantly sabotage herself!
I started to recognize this reality a little while back. To be quite honest, it is because of this "weight-loss journey" I have seen it!
A while back I got on the scale and I was only 3lbs away from goal number 1! OK, goal number one was twenty pounds, easy right? Not for me!
Any who, I was 3lbs away and two days later, I was 10lbs away! Are you frickin' kidding me!
I look back and see my exercise habits haven't changed, but my eating habits have!
OK, BACK ON TRACK! Don't get discouraged and move forward, I tell myself!
oh and I did, every time, I DID and I DO! Back on track! Back to 3lbs from goal number one! Two days later, 10lbs. away from goal one! Are you frickin' kidding me????!!
I look back on the last few days of diet and exercise and I see food has changed, exercise and goals haven't!
Wow, ohhhh wow! This has been going on for quite some time! I have been on my "weight-loss journey" since OCT-FREAKING-TOBER!
Well, now I am looking around, and I can see other areas, for myself, where I have sabotaged myself! Honestly, when it comes to hubby and the kiddos, any inkling of not meeting my standard, I get-it-together and I put my ducks in a row! No sabotage in life with my hubby and kiddos, it is only on myself! I see it in all areas that, quite honestly, pertain to me, work, prayer life, friendships, work-life, weight-loss. Of course all the previous areas, can in some ways have an effect on my hubby and kiddos, but until the changes have honestly been made, they don't really notice!
That's where I am at! I realize I constantly sabotage myself!
This is it, this is as far as I have made it. I realize I am my own problem.
Now what Chrissy? What's next? How are you going to beat your own sabotage?
I sabotage myself, constantly!
I can't believe I am actually saying this!
It's true, it's very honestly true!
I sabotage myself in going forward in so many goals!
It is beyond me, that someone who is soooo goal oriented as I am, can constantly sabotage herself!
I started to recognize this reality a little while back. To be quite honest, it is because of this "weight-loss journey" I have seen it!
A while back I got on the scale and I was only 3lbs away from goal number 1! OK, goal number one was twenty pounds, easy right? Not for me!
Any who, I was 3lbs away and two days later, I was 10lbs away! Are you frickin' kidding me!
I look back and see my exercise habits haven't changed, but my eating habits have!
OK, BACK ON TRACK! Don't get discouraged and move forward, I tell myself!
oh and I did, every time, I DID and I DO! Back on track! Back to 3lbs from goal number one! Two days later, 10lbs. away from goal one! Are you frickin' kidding me????!!
I look back on the last few days of diet and exercise and I see food has changed, exercise and goals haven't!
Wow, ohhhh wow! This has been going on for quite some time! I have been on my "weight-loss journey" since OCT-FREAKING-TOBER!
Well, now I am looking around, and I can see other areas, for myself, where I have sabotaged myself! Honestly, when it comes to hubby and the kiddos, any inkling of not meeting my standard, I get-it-together and I put my ducks in a row! No sabotage in life with my hubby and kiddos, it is only on myself! I see it in all areas that, quite honestly, pertain to me, work, prayer life, friendships, work-life, weight-loss. Of course all the previous areas, can in some ways have an effect on my hubby and kiddos, but until the changes have honestly been made, they don't really notice!
That's where I am at! I realize I constantly sabotage myself!
This is it, this is as far as I have made it. I realize I am my own problem.
Now what Chrissy? What's next? How are you going to beat your own sabotage?
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Wouldn't Have Changed a Thing!
If Anyone would have told me raising these children was going to be difficult and heart wrenching, I still wouldn't have believed them and I still wouldn't have changed a thing!
By the way, I think a few really did tell me, but I was too busy listening to my heart!
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